JL;DR SUMMARY In this text, the author discusses the life of Hasan al-Wazzan, also known as Leo Africanus, a Moroccan diplomat captured by pirates in the Mediterranean in 1518 and presented as a prize to Pope Leo X. Al-Wazzan was imprisoned in the Castel Sant'Angelo and eventually baptized and given the name Giovanni Leone. A way out west there was a fella, fella I want to tell you about, fella by the name of Jeff Lebowski. At least, that was the handle his lovin' parents gave him, but he never had much use for it himself. This Lebowski, he called himself the Dude. Now, Dude, that's a name no one would self-apply where I come from. But then, there was a lot about the Dude that didn't make a whole lot of sense to me. And a lot about where he lived, likewise. But then again, maybe that's why I found the place s'durned innarestin'.